Posted Nov. 11, 2023

Last newsletter we discussed the yearly pressure of Christmas presents. This week is focused on ideas that will draw your family together with memories your kids will cherish. Christmas should be a season – not a single day. Creating an atmosphere of giving, joy and beauty is the focus. Finding depth in why we even have “Christmas” should also be high on the list.

Last week we looked at 1) Propaganda and 2) Cheap toys. Missed that newsletter? You can find it at DiscoveryParkOhio.com under the blogs tab – look for “The Next New Toy”.

3) Setting the stage – Decorating the house to set the mood starts the countdown. But first make a calendar for December. Don’t make it look professional. Just take a good size of paper and hand draw a calendar. Have fun making it. It will put you in the mood too. Make a list of fun things for the family and start writing them on this calendar. Then take strips of paper and cover all the days. Put tape along the top to make a flap. Cut the strip to reveal each date. Then use a touch of glue stick to fasten each date down until that date comes. Be creative like the picture below. We’re about to create the mood for each day/evening as the countdown begins.

The first evening might be popping popcorn and stringing it on thread – hanging it on an outside tree for the birds. This is teaching the idea that when we give, don’t expect a return. The birds aren’t going to bring you a thank you gift.

Don’t drag out the decorations from previous years and repeat – maybe take some garlands and let the kids find a new way to use them (family creativity and idea generation). As they explore how to use the garland, they are also practicing negotiating skills and conflict resolution as they decide which idea they should use. Let their ideas be the winners. If something doesn’t look good, ask them to evaluate and maybe try something else. Maybe they will love it and you lose. This may go on for several days. Slowly the house is becoming “Christmas”.

Bring on the tree! Go to a lot where you can choose and cut your own tree. Let the kids pick out the right tree. Let them negotiate, visualize it in their house. Stand next to the tree so they can estimate the size indoors. When a tree is outdoors is will look much smaller than it really is. Maybe they will choose a Charlie Brown tree. Don’t let them get carried away with big and glamorous. You’re not out to win a competition. Grab the saw and let them cut down the tree and carry it to the front. This is ownership. This is our “Chosen” tree!

Now the tree is home. Everyone is in the mood. Where shall we put it. Should we rearrange the furniture? Maybe take something out of the room and put it in the garage or basement for the time. Don’t just do what you have always done. Maybe even put the tree in a different room. The decision has been made. The tree is in it’s new home. Allow them to choose who will be responsible to crawl under the tree each night to add water to the base.

Focus on the aroma of the tree. How does having a tree inside the house change the room? Ask them why we have Christmas trees. Let them theorize or research where this tradition comes from. Maybe we should put a big potted tomato plant in the living room in August (just kidding).

Now it’s time to decorate. NO PURCHASED ORNAMENTS! Every ornament must be hand made by the kids and you. If you have some very special ornaments stored away, you can use them after you have told a rousing story of why this ornament is so special. Then vote whether it is allowed or rejected. There’s always next year. Again, every ornament must be hand made by the kids and you. They will love it – after a few groans – and you will love the interaction. Nothing has to be perfect. Their skills and the fun are way more important. Add some different kinds of ornaments all month. This is not something that has to be done today! Gradually the tree will gain its place in the family. Skip the lights.

Grandparents and relatives: Tell them flat out – no purchased toys, tickets or outings. Kids want to interact with their relatives. Make something together in the kitchen, sew together, build something together. Let their passions and hobbies be shared. Tell them if they buy something – it will be going home with them. Pick up on their talents – Christmas songs, storytelling (What was your favorite Christmas memory)?

Presents: Everyone has to make a present for each member of the family – plus one extra present. After all the handmade presents have been exchanged and opened, take each extra present and draw a family members name out of a hat – they get the present.

More family sharing ideas: Cut out snowflakes from folded paper, make candles, bake and decorate cookies, make gingerbread houses, clay ornaments, paper mache – Learn to “kazoo”. Learn how to harmonize, do duets. Make a stage out of a low table – shine a light and let each do a “performance”. Learn how to do fancy box wrapping techniques by watching videos. Don’t use Christmas wrapping paper – find wrapping stuff from newspapers, junk mail and old coloring books (color them first). We used to wrap presents with the Sunday comic pages.

When Christmas eve comes, take the time to share why Christmas is celebrated. Don’t just tell the story, tell the importance of each piece of the story. That is the gift we are remembering.

I know this is a huge makeover. That’s why I have put these ideas out early so you have time to digest them and consider what would work for your family, your situation. Share your ideas with your friends, your clubs, your work mates. See if they start rethinking Christmas. Maybe they will start coming up with more ideas, some to share with another family. Write any new ideas down. Maybe you can use them next year. The heart of a family Christmas is not the “Stuff” or fancy vacations. It's about “am I loved” and “how can I love others”.

Merry Christmas! (a little early)

That’s what good play is all about.

No directions, nobody telling you that
“you can’t do it that way”.

It’s pure discovery!